Springtime brings many new things including new starts and celebrations. We journeyed to Kansas last weekend to celebrate the college graduations of my oldest nephew and niece. After the hardships and sorrow our family has been through recently, this was all a grand opportunity to be joyful and celebrate. The weather was wonderful, the ceremonies were filled with the usual pomp and circumstance, and everyone came together to note their accomplishments. I’m so very proud of all of my nieces and nephews – it’s been a delight to watch them grow up and to be able to share in their lives.
Family
A trip south for family and warmth
Yesterday I made a quick trip south to warmer climes – about 200 miles to Ames, Iowa. The landscape was devoid of snow and the temps were in the low 50’s (almost tropical for this person from Minnesota where it had just dumped seven inches of snow on Friday!). My nephew plays on the Kansas State Rugby team and they were playing the Iowa State team in Ames. I don’t have much experience with rugby, but it is a fast-moving game, rough and tumble, and a testament to endurance and teamwork. This match was very physical and included some tough injuries too. In the end, the Iowa State team prevailed over Kansas State. But the day provided time for catching up with my nephew and my brother & sister-in-law — well worth the drive!
A family gathered together
This is a photograph of a family that’s come together to support one another amid a series of losses the past six months. There is love and caring, trust and help. We’ve shared our laughter, our tears, our sorrow, and our togetherness; we’ve opened our hearts to one another, and we’ve learned new things about each other in the process. When one of us was down, there was someone to listen to us, someone to comfort us, someone to hold us close. There was someone to take the lead when decisions needed to be made or tasks needed to be accomplished. I have a renewed appreciation for each of the people in this photograph.
With the recent deaths in my family I now understand first-hand the importance of photographing and preserving the memories that we collect over a lifetime. This photograph was taken after the funeral service for my mother. There was a mixture of sorrow and celebration in all of our hearts, but this is my family and I’m so very proud of our love and connection – something instilled in us all by both my mother and my father.
A mother’s love
My family has come together yet again, this time to be with my mother. Since living by herself four months after my father’s death, she didn’t have the strength/will to battle the health issues she was facing. On Tuesday she passed away with my brothers and me by her side. As we process through this, I know this is how she’d want it, as family was first and foremost for her.
The night of her death, this photo fell out of a file folder – a visual reminder of the closeness, protectiveness, and love my mother gave to me, as well as my brothers, my nieces and nephews, and our extended family.
As we gather to celebrate her life, I know she will be proud of her family — seeing us all together to help one another through our sorrow and loss.
A life of grace between the lines
After my father passed away last week we found that he had already written his obituary. It was a factual listing of his life, his work, his groups and associations, and his family members. But I’m choosing to look at his life by reading between those lines – to remember and cherish his true character. My dad was brave and courageous; not only did he answer the call to serve his country during the Korean war, but he also faced (and won) a battle with inoperable lung cancer 15 years ago. He was a teacher by words and example, whether it be math story problems or fishing and hunting. He was supportive of all the things we were involved in – football or baseball games, piano or choir concerts. My dad had a wonderful sense of curiosity and adventure; he was always wondering what was “down that road,” what is “around the bend,” and “where does this path lead.” When I was 10 years old Dad and I floated a river in a bright yellow canoe, to see what was along the way (and I think he was prodding my sense of adventure and trust). He was an immensely talented man in his chosen career of architecture, and he left a profound mark on the people he worked with in that profession. He had a fierce streak of independence and determination; his way was what he was going to follow. But most of all he was a proud man, of his family, his children, and his grandchildren. A lover and best friend of 62+ years to my mother, and a loving and committed father and grandfather. These are some of the traits that my father did not include in his obituary, but the people who knew him will recognize them all. As I was en route to see my father for the last time I heard a quote by Don Snyder: “There is grace in an ordinary life.” Dad – you exuded grace (and adventure) in your “ordinary” life. Thank you.

